Self-Evaluation

‘I want to be an accountant!’ This is my typical answer when I’m asked about my intention of future career. An accountant is my dream profession since high school. However, I haven’t been really preparing myself for that.

Currently, I’m almost a fourth-year accounting student at RULE, but still I find myself an empty shell, especially when I evaluate my competence compared to the requirements of being an accountant. Various subjects related to accounting and finance have been offered but it seems as if none of them is fully studied. I’m not blaming or dare not to anyone for that because I know the fault is the combination of several factors. The most unforgiveable one is me, myself.

There are devils within me, causing me to ‘fail’ in doing things. Surely, it does not make me fail the exams, but fail to recall and apply what I’ve learnt. I’m confident enough to say that it’s very easy to pass an exam while it’s difficult to apply what I’ve learnt. Shamefully, everyone admires and compliments me that I'm a top or outstanding student, who manages to obtain A’s in almost every subject; but, who can understand what I feel?! While I get an A grade, I would ask myself what I've learnt and find that it is so little and it’s inapplicable.

I always tell myself to study, study and study and learn the underlying concepts of each chapter. I'm actually able to understand it at first, after some periods of time, however, I've unwillingly thrown it miles away. I simply study for the exam!

Someone used to ask me how to concentrate while reading. I would say that neither do I know the method. The willingness to read a book just comes unknowingly. You cannot force it! When it does come, I can read books from the morning till night; when it comes, I can do accounting exercise the whole day allowing no entrance of disturbances. But it doesn’t come very often. There is another devil would appear and prevent it from occurring unless there is a motivation. Most of the time I tell myself that I should not put too much pressure on myself; I should watch TV, play PC games, or simply go to my dreamland to gather energy. Very often, this becomes an excuse which I use to avoid reading books. Adversely, doing those sorts of things even makes me more tired.

The two devils—forgetful and lazy, perhaps there are more, make me a loser in studying even though I appear to be the best in people’s idea. People who know me may not believe what I write here; they would think that I'm just too modest or I have too low opinion of myself. But I know myself.

Change is very necessary or else I'll be continually a loser. But there are so many question marks floating in my mind. How to do that? How can I develop an interest in reading by myself instead of waiting for its presence? How can I always remember what I've learnt? How can I answer every questions raised by the teachers? How can I fully understand what I've learnt?...

You have the answers?

IYF 1st Volunteer Workshop

For three days that I've participated in the volunteer workshop of IYF (International Youth Fellowship) in NIE. The workshop is conducted by IYF, cooperated with MoEYS, to teach Cambodian students to understand themselves better and to select some participants from this workshop so that they are prepared to be volunteer for the upcoming World Camp, which is to be held in Cambodia from April 26-May 01, 2o10.

There were more than 500 participants in this workshop. We were offered some snacks—a bottle of water and a bread, and we were also given a piece of paper in which there were two or three questions related to the workshop that we had to answer at the end of each workshop. Our answers will be used to evaluate our appropriateness to be a volunteer in this World Camp, since not all participants will be chosen.

Personally, I like the performance of the group of dancers whose dancing is based on different cultures—Japan, South Africa, and Korea. Every performance had its uniqueness. Besides, we were also introduced to two Korean volunteers through a form of play based on a true-to-life personal experience. Both of them had a problem within their family which made them lose hope in life and was defeated by obstacles, but finally they realized the truth meaning of living after joining IYF. I’m not sure how many percent of the story is true, but it does teach us a lesson like what we learn from a literature work. Before coming to the end of each workshop, the Chairman of IYF in Cambodia would have a long talk about the world of human mind. The talk would seem boring if one doesn’t pay attention and develop a deeper thought while he was listening. The Chairman told us several stories along with some analysis related to human thinking. Through the interpretation of his talk (he is a Korean), I fully understand about myself that there are several unwanted aspects within me which deter me from being successful in completing an intended goal. The workshop helps me build up my confidence and strengthen my determination. It suggests me to get rid of laziness and be brave to face up with challenge and make changes.

It’s a good opportunity to learn about yourself as you participate in the workshop of IYF. There are another two workshops which will be held before the World Camp starts on April 26. Therefore, interested students should participate if convenient.

A Gathering at Ms. Manashi's House

On February 19, we had a good time together at Ms. Manashi's house where we had, for the first time, experienced the taste of Indian food.

All classmates from Asian American class, except for three, shared some money to buy souvenirs for our teacher, Ms. Manashi, with whom we've been studying for two courses. At first, we had planned to have a trip around Phnom Penh; however, we finally changed to have a small party at her house—main purpose is to try Indian food. On that day, we spent so much time buying the souvenirs and fruit for the visit that we arrived at her house at almost five. When we arrived there, everything was almost prepared; therefore, we didn't really help her make it or observe how it was made. Ecstatically, it was time for tasting!

We were in a beautiful room, eating delicious Indian food which gave us a brandnew experience and distinctive memory. My first impression toward the food was that it tends to be salty, hot and spicy. I think Indian people like potatoes much since among the dishes we had, there were three dishes that were made of potatoes. However, Ms. Manashi tried to adjust the taste so that it matched our taste bud. For example, she didn't put chillies in the chicken curry (but it was a bit hot due to the spices) because she knows we can't stand food that is too hot. We had dessert, made of milk, rice and dried grapes. Its taste matches my appetite. Finally, we were offered the traditional Indian tea. Surprisingly, it seems like milk, but mixed with some ginger. The color just looks like what we call 'Red tea milk'.

The three-hour gathering seemed to be very short when we were having a good time. It was the second time which I've participated in a party with UC classmates and teachers. I was very enjoying and relaxing although I am still in the week of exams at another university.

An interview, the meaning of blogging

Recently I was invited for an interview on the topic of ‘Cambodian Female Blogger’, which is a research done by a senior undergraduate from Department of Media and Communication, RUPP.

Last month I received a comment from Ms Lyda, the undergraduate, who requested for my participation in this research which I found interesting. We finally met on 15th of February. The interview took about an hour when I was asked several questions related to the creation of my blog.
Here are some questions I was asked.

‘When did I create this blog?’
‘What are the purposes of creating it?’
‘What are the benefits that I expect to obtain from this blog?’
‘Are there any constraints from my family or the society that deter me from blogging?’
……

Some bloggers have some special and unique intention for the creation of their blog. In fact, I have never had such an intention in creating this blog or noticed or expected any significant benefits I have been receiving or will receive from it. My basic intention was to share my experiences, knowledge, and impressions about something to interested people, or sometimes it’s just a means of relieving my feelings of stress and discontents. However, after being asked, I find that the most significant benefits I have been getting from blogging are the improvement of my writing ability and the development of my thinking and analyzing skill. I also develop a writing habit about any special events that worth sharing with my readers. It’s what I feel thankful for!

My Chinese New Year

To me, this holiday for New Year was full of anxiety and discomfort, for I’ll have to face with another week of final exams at my university. Having to focus on the lessons to be reviewed for the exams was difficult when everybody was enjoying the festival. You might not be able to understand my feeling if you were not in the same circumstance.

Chinese New Year is supposed to be the time for enjoyment and worry free. However, the exams have been haunting me for the whole week. It would surprise you if I say that I even feel guilty while watching those interesting entertainment shows for New Year on television since I have a feeling that I’m not yet ready for the exams. I only wish that all exams had been done before the holiday.

However, on the first day of the New Year (14th February), my family went for sightseeing around Phnom Penh and finally we arrived at Koh Pich (Diamond Island) without plan. Having heard of the development of this island for a period of time, I also want to see how it looks.

Located on the south-eastern part of Phnom Penh on the Tonle Bassac River, Koh Pich is a small island of 68 hectares in size on which several projects are being carried out. Some parts of it are open to public now. Notably, the Koh Pich Center is one of the most popular avenues for newly-wed couples to have their wedding party celebrated. The park on the left hand side of the building is being built and decorated in European style. In distance, we can see buildings are being constructed.

I believe that in a few years this island will be one of the most important centers in Phnom Penh and modernizes the whole city.

The followings are some pictures I took on the island.

The Working-Girls of New York, Summary and analysis

Written in 1868, The Working-Girls of New York is extracted from the original essay, Folly As It Flies, by Fanny Fern. Notably, the setting of the essay is in the mid-nineteenth century New York when Industrial Revolution has struck the northern states of America.

The author illustrates women’s suffrage in living in this period whether or not they were married, rich or poor. Women with large income husband were left at home to keep the house when her husband was busy doing businesses outside. Rarely did he have time to care for his family. Whereas the poor working girls, they also had to live a hard life which were affected by Industrial Revolution. The author stresses the working and living condition of those working girls. They could hardly satisfy their basic needs. They had to share a small, dirty, stuffy room; they never had a properly cooked and nutritious food. In addition, their clothes were of low quality and torn. Talking about their workplace, it’s a ‘black-looking building’ where hundreds of working girls had to stand working in the assembly line from seven in the morning till six in the evening but received low wages compared to men. The machinery was deafening which a visitor to the factory would never be able to bear with more than five minutes.

The author sympathizes the young working girls who had to work like a machine. Although they were young in the age, they were almost like an adult in their look and their share of responsibilities in their family.

To conclude, the author intended to criticize the effects of Industrial Revolution had on the society, especially on women. This essay is to call for notice and reform to the prevalent issues happening in industrial workplace such as overcrowding, poor working conditions, sweatshops, child and women labor, and long working hours.

Late Again!

I don’t like being kept waiting. It would frustrate me in some ways when it is time and the person hasn’t shown up yet. To me, a punctual person is responsible and reliable.

As I’ve observed, some people tend to be late on purpose. They may not intend to keep others waiting, but they believe that the rest are late. They simply do not want to wait for others, so they think they don’t have to be in a hurry to arrive on time. As these ideas preoccupy them, coming late unconsciously becomes the person’s habit or happens as a common custom of the place or among that particular group of people. For example, students go to class late on purpose because the teacher is also a ‘late-comer’ whom the students imitate the same attitude. In another case, the students may follow one another when the teacher is not strict enough to punish those who are usually late. Sooner or later, the classroom becomes anarchic; students go to school just to wait for the teacher or other students, and ultimately they learn few things from a session because the study process is slowed down and disturbed by late-coming students and the ‘busy’ teacher.

In terms of schoolwork, a number of students usually procrastinate till the last minute to do the assigned tasks. Some even ask for permission to complete them when they come due. Perhaps the tasks are submitted on time because of their ‘determination’ to stay up late the night before the day in which it is collected; I’d say, however, that they will not be well graded. This learning attitude can be widely found in universities.

Coming late tends to be a culture for Cambodian people. It is not only students who go to school late, but also the working class people, especially the governmental officials, when the disciplines are not strictly or seriously enforced. In daily appointments, when people arrange time to meet, one would suggest quarter or half an hour early as a reserve for those who come late. Why don’t people arrive on time?

‘Late better than never’ seems to be a good excuse of being late. It might be argued that at least we will get something although we are late. But why don’t you come on time or even before time to grab the whole? In fact, many good opportunities and benefits are waiting for the first comer, the most hard-working one, and the last leaver—as we have always heard of ‘First come, first serve’.