‘I want to be an accountant!’ This is my typical answer when I’m asked about my intention of future career. An accountant is my dream profession since high school. However, I haven’t been really preparing myself for that.
Currently, I’m almost a fourth-year accounting student at RULE, but still I find myself an empty shell, especially when I evaluate my competence compared to the requirements of being an accountant. Various subjects related to accounting and finance have been offered but it seems as if none of them is fully studied. I’m not blaming or dare not to anyone for that because I know the fault is the combination of several factors. The most unforgiveable one is me, myself.
There are devils within me, causing me to ‘fail’ in doing things. Surely, it does not make me fail the exams, but fail to recall and apply what I’ve learnt. I’m confident enough to say that it’s very easy to pass an exam while it’s difficult to apply what I’ve learnt. Shamefully, everyone admires and compliments me that I'm a top or outstanding student, who manages to obtain A’s in almost every subject; but, who can understand what I feel?! While I get an A grade, I would ask myself what I've learnt and find that it is so little and it’s inapplicable.
I always tell myself to study, study and study and learn the underlying concepts of each chapter. I'm actually able to understand it at first, after some periods of time, however, I've unwillingly thrown it miles away. I simply study for the exam!
Someone used to ask me how to concentrate while reading. I would say that neither do I know the method. The willingness to read a book just comes unknowingly. You cannot force it! When it does come, I can read books from the morning till night; when it comes, I can do accounting exercise the whole day allowing no entrance of disturbances. But it doesn’t come very often. There is another devil would appear and prevent it from occurring unless there is a motivation. Most of the time I tell myself that I should not put too much pressure on myself; I should watch TV, play PC games, or simply go to my dreamland to gather energy. Very often, this becomes an excuse which I use to avoid reading books. Adversely, doing those sorts of things even makes me more tired.
The two devils—forgetful and lazy, perhaps there are more, make me a loser in studying even though I appear to be the best in people’s idea. People who know me may not believe what I write here; they would think that I'm just too modest or I have too low opinion of myself. But I know myself.
Change is very necessary or else I'll be continually a loser. But there are so many question marks floating in my mind. How to do that? How can I develop an interest in reading by myself instead of waiting for its presence? How can I always remember what I've learnt? How can I answer every questions raised by the teachers? How can I fully understand what I've learnt?...
You have the answers?
Currently, I’m almost a fourth-year accounting student at RULE, but still I find myself an empty shell, especially when I evaluate my competence compared to the requirements of being an accountant. Various subjects related to accounting and finance have been offered but it seems as if none of them is fully studied. I’m not blaming or dare not to anyone for that because I know the fault is the combination of several factors. The most unforgiveable one is me, myself.
There are devils within me, causing me to ‘fail’ in doing things. Surely, it does not make me fail the exams, but fail to recall and apply what I’ve learnt. I’m confident enough to say that it’s very easy to pass an exam while it’s difficult to apply what I’ve learnt. Shamefully, everyone admires and compliments me that I'm a top or outstanding student, who manages to obtain A’s in almost every subject; but, who can understand what I feel?! While I get an A grade, I would ask myself what I've learnt and find that it is so little and it’s inapplicable.
I always tell myself to study, study and study and learn the underlying concepts of each chapter. I'm actually able to understand it at first, after some periods of time, however, I've unwillingly thrown it miles away. I simply study for the exam!
Someone used to ask me how to concentrate while reading. I would say that neither do I know the method. The willingness to read a book just comes unknowingly. You cannot force it! When it does come, I can read books from the morning till night; when it comes, I can do accounting exercise the whole day allowing no entrance of disturbances. But it doesn’t come very often. There is another devil would appear and prevent it from occurring unless there is a motivation. Most of the time I tell myself that I should not put too much pressure on myself; I should watch TV, play PC games, or simply go to my dreamland to gather energy. Very often, this becomes an excuse which I use to avoid reading books. Adversely, doing those sorts of things even makes me more tired.
The two devils—forgetful and lazy, perhaps there are more, make me a loser in studying even though I appear to be the best in people’s idea. People who know me may not believe what I write here; they would think that I'm just too modest or I have too low opinion of myself. But I know myself.
Change is very necessary or else I'll be continually a loser. But there are so many question marks floating in my mind. How to do that? How can I develop an interest in reading by myself instead of waiting for its presence? How can I always remember what I've learnt? How can I answer every questions raised by the teachers? How can I fully understand what I've learnt?...
You have the answers?
